Walking Down Memory Lane

This time of year usually begins "the reflection". Right around the 4^th of July and coming up on my dad’s birthday. My thoughts go back to my childhood and the reality I had then, and the memory I have now of my dad.

I didn’t have the perfect childhood. Really, how many of us do? But I choose to leave that firmly in the past having moved on some time ago. I like to remember now the good things. I dwell on the things my dad accomplished that make me so proud of him. I directly attribute my love of country to him. Also my love of God. God and country.

My dad served in the Army’s Second Armored Division in the 1950’s. Now he rests at DFW National Cemetery. When I visit him there, I feel a connection to my country and to those who served it so well. I’m passionate about it. Maybe even a little obsessive. Someone used to tell me if I cut myself, I’d bleed red, white and blue. I take that as a compliment.

I’m so proud of my dad and his service to this great country. I wish now I could be just as proud of my government, but we have a huge mess to clean up first.  As I stand looking out at row upon row of graves at the cemetery, their lines in perfect symmetry, it’s really beautiful. It also breaks my heart when I see the direction this country is heading. This is not what my dad fought for. I pray for my country. I pray for our brave servicemen and women. They do far more than they ever recieve credit for.

I hope someday I can find a way to serve my country too. Aside from sending a few care packages here and there, I’m not sure what my purpose is yet. Until I figure that out, I’ll keep beating the drum for our veterans here, and gone.

God Bless America.

Searching for and Finding Hope

You are in a war. I am in a war. We are in a war, whether you know it, or not. Either you have picked a side and are fighting or hiding; or you are merely a pawn. This is a spiritual war, but it is violent and bloody nonetheless. I know this because I walk among the wounded. I AM the wounded. You may be hurt too. You may know heartbreak and sadness so great, it’s unexplainable. My heart has been broken before…by young, old and in-between. I have known pain so bright, so deep that I thought surely this kills a human. But I don’t die. I wake up every morning and I know there must be a reason I’m still here. I have children of course that have to be raised. And by God’s grace I will do that, and do it well while loving them totally every second of every minute.

But what amazes me, is that not only do I wake up, but I wake up with hope in my heart. A hope that I wish sometimes would die because it would be easier then to just quit. But something stops me. It won’t allow me to quit. There is this raw nagging hope deep in my soul. And when I’m not angry with it, I’m so eternally grateful for it. I know that hope is God supplied. I know he gives me that hope to keep me, keeping-on. He has a perfect plan for me. And there must be some reason he has brought me through the storms of life to be exactly in this place and time. Not on top of the mountain, but not at the base either. Somewhere in-between where he can keep pushing me up, and sometimes holding me back. All for His perfect accomplishment. And I will be the better for it.

Pick up your sword and fight. This is a war.  You and I are in it.  Like it or not, we are in it until the end is concluded. And, here comes that hope…I know how the story ends.